Monday, November 2, 2009

Judgement

Today I clearly woke up on the wrong side of the bed. I was up most of the night with Naomi, who woke every so often and had to have someone (me) touching her at all times. Then add the three year old who could not get comfy and was sleeping sideways on our bed, in the middle. In the middle of the night I finally just took her back to her bed and told her I need you to sleep in here. Luckily she was fine with that and went right to sleep. Back to bed I went and dealt with the touch needing child. So I slept awful. When I got up this morning I was crabby and as the morning progresses it just got worse. I sat at the computer with my morning cocoa and was reading various internet like things and felt the pit in my stomach get bigger and bigger. Judgement was building and I did not like it.

Of all the feelings we have judgement is probably one of the worst for me. I do not like feeling judged and I do not like feeling judgemental. Who am I to judge anyone? I'm not God, what I think does not matter. Everyone can make their own choices and live with them. I am not perfect and know I judge others sometimes and things others do, but why??? Why do we all judge each other so much?

I think judgement is rampant in the "Mommy World." Especially online, there are forums for all types of parenting, all types of schooling styles, all types of living styles, you name it I bet there is a forum out there for it. But really does it matter? Why does it matter whether a mom chooses to work or stay at home? Does one make her a better mother? Maybe, but that's for that mom to decide which one makes her a better mother! Am I better than you because I cloth diaper? Nope. Are you better than me because you send your kids to school? Nope. Is a home birth better than a hospital birth? Nope. These are silly, simple things that make up what we do, not who we are! We are all mothers. That is our tying bond. Motherhood. If our kids are loved why does it matter the method chosen to get there? We are all living our lives as we see fit and who is anyone else to tell us what we can, should, shouldn't, wouldn't, can't, or won't do. A friend on one of the forums I belong to had this in her signature line for the longest time: End the Mommy Wars! I think she about summed it up there.

1 comment:

Hear Mum Roar said...

Oh, I couldn't agree more. Our differences are what brings so much flavour to the world.